Cat shenanigans

Last night’s events from my point of view.

9:30 PM – Have a hot bath, give myself a manicure

10:00 PM – Go to bed, fall asleep immediately (which if you know me is pretty rare)

Sometime during the night – Cat2 gets into bed and snuggles and purrs, I half-awake pet her for a while, then fall back to sleep.  I am vaguely aware of her trying to grab my hand with her paw/claws.

Some later time during the night – HOLYCRAPWHATTHEFUCK!!!! Why is there cold water on my head, pillow, bed, everywhere? 

The BF and I jump out of bed, and spot Cat2 sitting on the floor.  She proceeds to roll onto her back and look at us for tummy rubs.  We get up, try to absorb as much water from the bed as possible, and go get pillows from the boys’ room.  As we are mopping up the water we find little beads, I look at my wrist to see my bracelet missing.  We pick up as many beads as we can find, throw a couple more towels on the bed as a barrier to the still wet mattress, and try to go back to sleep.  A Cat2 immediately jump back onto the bed and snuggles and purrs, I half-awake pet her for a while, then fall back to sleep.

How I imagine the events transpired from Cat2’s point of view.

Hmmm, I think I need some attention, I’ll go wake up  mummy.  I love when she pets me like that.  Huh, she seems to have fallen back to sleep, I’ll claw at her hand so she understands that I wasn’t finished.  Oooh, a bracelet, let’s see if we can’t snap that off and play with pretty beads.  Well, done playing with the beads and it didn’t even wake her up.  What’s that? A glass of water on the nightstand, that ought to do the trick, I’ll just knock it over and the refreshing water will wake her up, She will surely thank me with belly rubs.  Oops, she doesn’t seem to happy about the surprise bath, oh well, she’s awake now, Ill offer her my magnificent belly for her to rub.  Why is she getting back into bed, my belly is unrubbed?  I’ll just climb back into bed with her.  There we go, she finally understood, more snuggles.  Well, I’m done, what’s Cat1 up to?

In case you are wondering, yes, this is the same cat from this event.

That darned cat

I am seriously thinking of offering to sell my 6 month old kitten to Iran, or any other country that would want a weapon of mass destruction.  I think I could make a fortune, she is pretty inexpensive to maintain and seems to have an unlimited supply of energy and every time you think she is at the peak of her destructive powers, you get a surprise.  Though that would probably lower the price; the fact that she is completely unpredictable and uncontrollable. 

She even has thumbs, and while the vet keeps assuring me that they are not opposable or functional, I have my doubts.

My older cat, let’s call him H, is a very mellow cat.  He never tries to eat your food (unless it’s tomato basil rice cakes, green olives, or blueberry flax cookies), never jumps on counters or anything higher than the couch or bed, is afraid to go outside, and restricts his play to things I plan to throw away anyhow like Qtips or wrappers.  I’ve had him since he was 2 months old, and I swear, he came that way, I never even had to show him the litter box.  I don’t think I ever fully appreciated him until recently when we got the kitten.

The kitten, little S, will eat anything she can attain (even a salad isn’t safe), will play with everything, and I’m starting to think she is afraid of the floor since I don’t recall the last time I saw her at ground level, unless she is making a mad dash to run outside before we have a chance to close the door.  Seriously, if you want to find the kitten, jiggle a doorknob.

I have seen her open drawers to get to stuff; I even woke up to her trying to pull an earplug out of my ear in the middle of the night to play with it.

Her most recent act of kitten destruction, she managed to knock over half (though how she got the two halves apart I’ll never know) of my drawer storage in the bathroom.  Not the half that contains the bigger items like spare bottles of shampoo, no, of course not.  She pulled down the half that had all the little things in it, like makeup, jewellery, hairpins, etc.

5 full drawers all spilled out onto the bathroom floor. When did she do this you ask, well I don’t know exactly when she did it, I found it at 12:30 AM after an exhausting family party and an hour long drive home in crappy weather.  Did I mention I had to work the next morning?  Just as I dropped my arms in despair, a small black bundle of very guilty looking fur came slowly out of the bedroom looking as guilty as a cat can possible look, and I instantly melted.  I gave her a snuggle and she watched, very calm and not daring to approach the scene of her crime, while I picked it all up.

I think that would increase the price, I mean a nuclear bomb can’t be cute after all of its destruction now can it.